| 10:00am 03/02/2010 | |||
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Adventures at Lamestop: Me: Is there anything coming out that you're looking forward to? Lady: I don't know what's coming out. Me: Well I noticed you've got a DS... you know LEGO Harry Potter is coming out pretty soon! :D :D :D The promo for it is playing on the touchscreen doohickie right now and-- Lady: *deathglare* We aren't interested in Harry Potter. Me: Uh. I. Uh. ....Oh? Lady: I don't let my children get into that sort of thing. Me: I... you... have a nice... day? (Seriously, I'd heard about people who thought Harry was the devil, but had never met one, and this came so out of left field that I was speechless.) Another really cool game coming out for the DS soon is about a flamingly gay prosecutor and his adventures in being able to walk, but I decided not to mention that one to her... Also, yesterday we got a phone call at the store where apparently someone's seperate, private call had been spliced into our line (or something. Phones are operated by gnomes in smart little uniforms, for all I know). My manager and I both took a turn listening to some woman snarling about a computer and how that "sum'bitch can fix it his own self" before the other line rang and we regretfully had to hang up on her. (It occurred to me that it might have been her bluetooth dialing us from her purse or something, but her voice was as clear as if she were actually talking to me on the other line. Bugh?) (hopefully this doesn't inspire as much unbridled wank at C_S as the other post did. Jee-zus.) My poor boss is sick with food poisoning, which sucks for him but is cool for me 'cause I got called in to do an extra five hours yesterday. I would say that it's going to my laptop fund, but one of my teeth is bothering me again and apparently the blinding headaches I've been experiencing mean I need new glasses, so yeah. GLUH. Being an adult sucks. Also the space bar broke off of Rakuen day before yesterday ><; so now there's exposed circuitboard and a biddy little button. I don't really use Rakuen for anything except the tablet anymore, but still. Eugh. I'm tentatively opening $5 commissions for art, if anyone wants any. Hats are still for sale, $15 flat including shipping. You may also buy my left arm (I need the right one to wipe my butt with) for $1000 OBO. [end transmission] |
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| The three year old scammer | |||
| 10:19pm 31/01/2010 | |||
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I get a lot of kids in my store and by kids I don't just mean gamers who are younger than me, or gamers who are older than me but act younger than me; I mean children who are fourteen years of age or younger, coming in and killing time in the store while their mothers get their hair done at the salon down the way. I'm okay with waiting for mom to show up with a couple extra dollars or to approve an M-rated game. I'll use my discount card to shave off tax so that they can get something they're clearly really excited about. Hell, once I lent a kid four dollars because he didn't have enough and had already plugged in all of his gift cards and birthday money. This kid, though... He came in with some games that he wanted to trade in, and my boss started the transaction. As I'm working I hear the kid trying to return a game to us that he says 'doesn't work,' but he doesn't have the receipt and doesn't remember when he bought it. My boss refuses him pretty sternly, which is unusual for somebody like him who likes to be easygoing with customers. I was on the other register, but somebody came in with a system return, and I always like to have someone else handle the huge returns moneywise, so if I screw it up I'm not losing the store a zillion dollars. I call my boss over, then go to his register to finish the kid's trade. "He told me that all I was going to get was five-fifty," the kid said to me as I stepped up. "That's how it is," I shrug. It's hard to explain supply and demand to a preteen, but, "it all depends on how many we have and how popular the game is, what system is for and how old it is, and in what sha--" "You can't make it higher?" "Um. No. Sorry." I hit the button to cash him out, and tell him: "You're going to get five-fifty in store credit, is that okay?" "I want cash." I stare at the boy. As per store policy you've got to be seventeen or older to get cash for trades, and you must have photo ID with your name and birthdate on it. There's a Wal*mart down the way from us, and we get a lot of stolen games trying to come our way, so I'm always careful to take down all of the information and save it. It doesn't matter if you look seventeen or seventy; I need your info in case the police want it. That being said, the kid doesn't look a day over ten. "I can't give you cash unless you're over seventeen and have ID," I say. "If you want to get your dad, or your friend, or your older brother..." "They're not here. I don't have ID! Please can you give me cash?" "I can't, sorry. I really can't without an ID." "But I can tell you where I live and everything--" "That doesn't make you seventeen," I say with a weak grin. "You can still get store credit. I can't give you cash." "Fine," the kid sighs, "I'll take the other thing." I pull up my info screen. "Okay, can I get your first and last name, please?" "Marley Thompson.*" "Okay, and your street address?" "222 Anywhere street, Horsetown." "Al-righty, and your phone number?" "I don't know it." I look up from the number pad. "You don't know your phone number? You can use your house number if you want, it's for--" "I don't have it with me." "You don't have your number with you?" "No, it's programmed into my phone and I left it at home." I'm starting to get a little frustrated. "Do you know anyone's number?" "No." I decide to set that problem aside for the moment. "Okay... what's your birthday?" I usually ask 'date of birth?' but with kids who haven't spent most of their lives filling out paperwork, I ask for their birthday instead. "Um." The kid glances around. "June 24th.*" I type that in. "And the year?" "Uh...." Another glance around. "2006." I'd had my finger on the '1' button, ready to type in '199-' something. I'll admit that I'm not too good with math, so I actually started typing in the year he gave me until it occurred to me that even he couldn't be that young. I look up at him, confused. "Oh no, it's... it's 2007, yeah," the kid grins at me. "That would make you three," I point out to him. "I'm twelve," he assures me. "...... I'm going to let my manager handle this," I say finally. It's what I usually do when I suspect I'm dealing with a scammer. But I can't wrap my head around a twelve year old (or possibly younger) trying to scam us for five fifty in store credit. I occupy myself elsewhere while bossman finishes up the transaction, bewildered. Later, the kid returns. Apparently bossman managed to wring the kid's phone number out of him, though I don't know how or from where. This time Marley has a caseless UMD disc for season one of 'Da Ali-G Show.' I look it up and inform him that he'd be getting thirty eight cents in store credit for it (which is slightly more than the show itself is worth, but that's just MHO). "That's it?" "Yeah, sorry." I start to hand the disc back to him, thinking he wants the UMD more than thirty eight cents. Instead, he sighs, "I guess I'll take it." So I ring up the trade, and again I'm faced with inputting his info on the transaction screen. I remember his last name and zip code, but it doesn't do me much good since new information takes 24 hours to be saved in the system. I have to take down all the info over again, which includes the dreaded phone number. "Bossman," I call, "do you remember the phone number (this little crotchlump) this dude gave you?" "Sure," says the boss, "it's deet deet doot, doot doot deet doot." I punch the number in and come to the date of birth again. "Okay... you obviously weren't born in 2007, so I'm going to put in 1997." That would make him about twelve and a half. "'Kay," the boy replies nonchalantly. I swipe his card and send him on his way. $5.50 plus $0.38 comes to $5.88. This is the amount of store credit Marley currently had on his card. I'm working at the other register again (another magazine subscription for me, yay!) when Marley returns to bossman's counter with a PSP game he wants to buy. It's $16.49 after tax. Boss rings it up, then plugs in Marley's store credit. "Okay, you still owe me $10.61," Boss says. "But..." Marley protests. "I've got store credit." "You had five eighty-eight store credit," Boss informs Marley calmly. "Game and tax were $16.49. You've still got to give me ten dollars." "But I don't have..." "Can you get it from your mom?" "No..." "Well I can give you your store credit back, you can save it for something else." "Isn't there anything you can do?" Marley pleads. Bossman is clearly tired of him, and flatly refuses. Exit Marley. According to Bossman, the kid is in the store all the time and just isn't all that smart. I'd feel for him, but there are plenty of learning-disabled and otherwise-disabled people that I deal with all the time, and usually they have no problem reciting their phone number and date of birth-- it's something every kid has to memorize, or at least have written on the inside of their clothes or something. A cuter kid was one whom I asked to sign her name on the electronic pad, to which she shyly asked, "...in cursive?" I thought it was the most adorable thing ever. [end transmission] |
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| Careening into different subjects | |||
| 10:40am 31/01/2010 | |||
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It's slightly disturbing to hear the words "really glad this guy was killed, by the way" coming from the television set. I guess killing the head Taliban dude was necessary, but somebody dying (probably violently in his case) is never this great thing. Call me a bleeding heart, but don't people realize that these guys don't wake up first thing in the morning thinking "Good golly Allah, I think I'll be as evil as possible today"? They think they're doing the right thing. I just feel weird about people celebrating murdering somebody who probably had a family. Little Afghani sons and daughters and probably a wife who does whatever Afghani wives do, worrying every day that she's gonna see her husband's mutilated body on TV. And I mean, she can turn to her kids and say, "see, he died fighting for what's right and now he's going to heaven to be rewarded!" But it doesn't really take away the fact that now her kids have no father. And that probably now his kids and relatives will be these pissed-off little bundles of rage and revenge, and we're going to try to kill them too. War sucks, that's all I'm tryin' to say. In other news I'm reading When You Are Engulfed in Flames by David Sedaris and it's as hilarious as any Sedaris book is. I used to think that it was talent alone that made DS as funny as he is, but now I realize that it's talent and a really bizarre life. I mean he's OCD and obsessed with spiders and collects strange 17th century paintings for a living (he was going on about a portrait of a dog with giant nipples he's got in his office). I guess when I have as many experiences as he does (he's fifty? When did that happen?) I can look back and write about how weird my family is, too. I can't stress this point enough, but if you like David Sedaris and think he's funny, DO NOT fall for people telling you that Augusten Burroughs is just like him. He's not. He's dark and weird and the stuff he writes about could be funny in the right style, but instead it's just disturbing and makes you want to take a shower. So yeah. Sedaris good, Burroughs creepy and bad. And now I have to dig the truck out of the snow so I can get to work... [end transmission] |
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| Dance Magic Dance! | |||
| 03:22pm 21/01/2010 | |||
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Jaydee is playing the Kingdom Hearts game for the DS (6,734.9983 days over seventeen and a half, or whatever). THE STORY SO FAR: Axel: Well HEL-LO there, small vulnerable pretty! Roxas: ..... Axel: Let's go to a quiet, secluded place and... "have ice cream." Roxas: Well that doesn't seem suspicious at all! Okay! Axel: Here, suck on this. Roxas: It's salty! Jaydee: How did this game make it past the censors again? LATER: Larxene is a giant bitch, and everyone hates her. AFTER THAT: Axel: I have to go on a mission thing or something. Roxas: Oh... okay. Ice Cream Stick: A WINNAR IS YOU! THE NEXT DAY: Xion: Hi, I'm girl Roxas! Roxas: You are a female that is not Larxene, therefore I love you. Xion: Tee hee! I can use a keyblade too! Roxas: I have already forgotten about Axel. Here, suck on this. Xion: Hee! It's salty! Roxas: GIRLS ARE EVEN MORE AWESOME THAN KILLING STUFF. Xion: Tee hee! Jaydee: Wow I... really hate you. (And somehow I don't think Axel is going to be really pleased that you've discovered girls.) THAT EVENING: Xylophone: Did you hear? Somebody who went to Castle Orgasm exploded! Xenu: I hope it wasn't me! Jaydee: I really really hope it was Larxene. Ximbabwe: ROXAS GET BACK TO WORK WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING HERE Roxas: Is Axel dead? Ximbabwe: THIS IS COMING OUT OF YOUR PAYCHECK ...that's as far as I got. It's actually a really fun game, if you can laugh at all the blatant homosexual subtext. I guess I ought to play any other Kingdom Hearts game so some of the context makes sense to me. [end transmission] |
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| Here kitty | |||
| 01:48am 19/01/2010 | |||
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Went to Gaia to draw people's avatars again, for practice (Gaia people are demanding and they want weird things in their drawings, which helps me work with stuff I haven't done before). I really like how this one turned out, though in retrospect her head looks approximately the size of the moon. This is the image I was working off of:  (I usually blow it up so I can see what the heck is going on with those little pixels. You can clickie here for the massive version on my DA page. (tips and pointers are always appreciated. Also praise. And chocolate chex mix. Seriously that stuff is like crack.) Ugh. Eyeballs hurt. [end transmission] |
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| Pbbbbbt. | |||
| 08:56pm 18/01/2010 | |||
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So recently, Rakuen has been making a Sound of Doom (sort of a horrible, grinding RRRRRRRRRRTTTTTT noise coming from where the hard drive is), and I am afraid that my ol' Paradise Box is on its last legs. It means I need a new laptop, I guess. But with my hours cut so far back that they're bleeding, there's not much hope of me pulling three hundred plus dollars out of my ass to pay for even the cheapest of replacements. Therefore, I propose that I win the lottery immediately. ...The end. [end transmission] |
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| Nerdiness | |||
| 12:00pm 16/01/2010 | |||
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"Dear Mister Snape, I saw my first Quidditch match today, Gryffindor vs. Ravenclaw. I'd read all about the rules in the book, but seeing in real life is GREAT, everybody goes REALLY FAST! It was a close game until the Ravenclaw seeker (a girl) caught the Snitch. Mrs. Mcgonnagal says not to worry, that it's only the first match and we're still in the running for the Cup. I thought I'd like to be a Seeker like Harry Potter (I'm small like him, right? And my eyesight is pretty good). We had our first flying lesson on Wednesday after that, though, and when I got on the broom I was really queasy. Professor Ling wanted to send me to the Hospital Wing, but once I got off I was okay. My friend Horatio said it was okay not to like flying, that his dad didn't like it all that much either after he'd flown in an ice storm and the wind had gotten up under his robes and Horatio's mum had had to unfreeze his legs from the broom seat. Horatio told me that third-years get to go to Hogsmeade, which is a town at the bottom of the hill next to the school. Have you been there? I don't want to wait two more years to go, I think I'm going to ask Vlad to take me over Christmas holidays. Horatio says there's a sweet shop there that's really good. He let me try an Ice Mice (ice mouse?) and it was GOOD. (Vlad is okay about a lot of things, but he doesn't like having sweets in the house. I'm going to write him a letter and yell at him for never telling me about Chocolate Frogs!) Horatio says that there are a lot more really COOL sweets in the shop, and I can't WAIT to go. Maybe you and Nahne could come with us. I don't think Nahne likes sweets, but there's a haunted house there too. Vlad wrote me a letter about that my first week here and told me I wasn't to go near it at all, that it was bad for me and VERBOTEN, you know, because the ghosts bother me. Horatio says there's no ghosts there really, that it's rubbish and nothing scary happens there, but he's never seen Vlad when he's really angry, he gets big and his voice makes the windows shake. I know you can't write back because you're supposed to be not alive, but if I send you my Potions homework, will you help me with it? It's due Monday and I can't remember if you're supposed to put arrow root or anise in the Hiccup solution. Hope you're doing okay. Tell Nahne I said hi. Love, Saha Vars P.S. Please don't tell Vlad I asked for help on my homework." (I am a dork.) |
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| Also | |||
| 01:48am 16/01/2010 | |||
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[end transmission] |
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| By and By | |||
| 01:10am 16/01/2010 | |||
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Playing around with color again; tips are appreciated. This one took me awhile...my eyes are tired of looking at Shiny Saha of Doom. The original (bigger and brighter) version can be found and gawked at here at my DA page. My hands are super dry because of the weather and the cold and the crappy soap in the bathroom, and they look like wrinkly old lady hands :( [end transmission] |
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| Murr. | |||
| 04:24pm 15/01/2010 | |||
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From the comments in a Mental Floss article: Shortly after we got our miniature schnauzer we were given a doorstop schnauzer statue. Gandalf was scared of that door stop for months. He gave it a wide berth as he passed by it and sometimes, when bold, he engaged it in staring contests which he invariably lost. (The article asked commenters to post weird things their pets were afraid of, the most interesting [good or bad] seat-mate they'd ever had on a plane, and a recommendation for a good book.) In other news:  Trying to get the hang of the pretty pinkish, sort of watercolor-eqsue coloring that my Deviantart favorites folder is full of. Any tips or pointers (on color) from the real-type artist people? (I was trying to find a good example to link to, but apparently all the pieces that I thought were digital and just looked like watercolor are actually real watercolors. Ehm. But you guys know what I'm talking about, right? Anyway.) Yesterday in the early afternoon, I sat down on a chair (that I had been sitting in for some time before that) and it broke out from underneath me, sending me smashing to the floor. I lay there, very surprised (as you can imagine) on my back with one leg still in the air until Skittle came to help me up. My back is still a little sore from it, but we all knew that the chairs have been horribly abused and were nearing the end of their tolerance for our big ol' butts. I switched to another, different kind of chair. At dinner, that one split right in half and would have dumped me on the ground same as the first if I hadn't grabbed onto the table. Skittle thought the "OH SHIT" look on my face was hilarious and almost peed herself laughing. I wasn't hurt. But I mean c'mon, two in one day? Hurgh. [end transmission] |
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| More on my own awesomeness | |||
| 03:02am 12/01/2010 | |||
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In browsing the author pages of people that frequently get recommended on Sweet Revolution, I recognized a lot of user names... from my own review pages. Apparently the people that people like, like me. This makes me warm and tingly. Or it could be the apple cider. Also, in the past two days, I've experienced aching pain, stabbing pain, lingering pain, pounding pain, diarrhea, nausea, dizziness, fatigue, listlessness, and a nosebleed. Bguh. So anyway, while browsing through the pages of people who apparently JJF also has a webcomic up called Metanoia which, while the art leaves a lot to be desired (the first chapters especially, but it gets a lot better towards the later updates), has a super intricate and interesting plot, along with likable characters, and lots of guns and explosives and demons and angels and killing. A little bit reminiscent of Constantine, (if Constantine didn't suck) or Torchwood only with more gay. (Note to self, New Life Plan: Force JJF to hire Jesskat to take over the art position on Metanoia. Have him pay her lots of monies. Read new and improved Metanoia. Experience Lethal Orgasm. Die.) Ugh, I cannot sleep and I don't know why. It's three in the morning and I have to go somewhere tomorrow. God help me, they want me to go somewhere. (it'd be fine if I were asleep right now and not experiencing Random Acts of Poo. I mean, I usually get a free breakfast out of it. But ughhhhh. My everything hurts.) Final news, am still making hats. You want hats, yes you does. Fifteen bucks flat rate, including shipping. They cut my hours at work ;_; so now I have HOURS AND HOURS AND HOURS every day to sit around and make hats while gossiping about my coworkers with Skittle. (And though I love Skittle very much, I unfortunately don't even get paid minimum wage to talk to her. It's all pro bono. Pro bono doesn't feed my cheeseburger habit.) Guh Bluh. [end transmission] |
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| Well damn! | |||
| 04:16pm 10/01/2010 | |||
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While shamelessly Googling myself, I found out that Penny Candy won the Judge's Pick for Best Plot at the Sweet Revolution Awards (you've got to scroll down a bit). I didn't get a banner or anything, and uh, nobobdy actually told me that I'd won, but hey! People like it! Guess I'd better get to work on the ending, then. (I think I was nominated for Best Smut, but that may have been in a different contest...) I... I'm kinda flattered. [end transmission] |
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| All the news that's fit to.... you know. | |||
| 10:04am 26/12/2009 | |||
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Bad news: I had to work on Christmas Eve, and it was INSANE. Good news: I GOT A SONY EBOOK FOR CHRISTMAS. FUCKING WOOT: Bad news: Apparently everyone else got an ebook for Christmas, because the sony servers are swamped and I can't download the software to buy any books for my new toy. Good news: I finally get the software to download, after about a dozen failures. Bad news: It won't install on my laptop's ancient OS. Good news: I download it onto the desktop! Bad news: I don't have the administrator priveledges needed to install the software. Good news: I get the password from Mendy for the main account! Bad news: The password won't work. Good news: I access the account in safemode and change the password! Bad news: I can't find the software I downloaded. Good news: I download it again, and it installs like a dream! Bad news: I CAN'T FIND THE EBOOK'S USB CORD DDDDD: Good news: I find it!! Bad news: THE SONY SITE IS FROZEN. Good news: It unfreezes! Bad news: Now it's slower than frozen molasses. Good news: I find the book I want! Bad news: It gets stuck. Good news: I figure out I have to register first! Bad news: IT GETS STUCK AGAIN. At this point, I'm just sitting around waiting for the registration to go through. I still have to go to work today for the after-Christmas sale, and the poor dog has to go outside to pee. I haven't even gotten dressed. SONY WHY. EDIT: Good news: It became unstuck, and I put in my gift card code! Bad news: CODE IS INVALID DDDD: Good news: I put it in again and it works! Good news: I find the book I want! Good news: I buy it! Good news: It syncs to the reader! Good news: IT WORKS!!! Good news: I'm so happy that I go off to buy another book! Bad news: The bookstore is closed for 'updates,' and will be updated in 'a few short hours.' *headdesk* [end transmission] |
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| No, the OTHER Brittany. | |||
| 02:01pm 20/12/2009 | |||
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Brittany Murphy Dies of Cardiac Arrest Random celebrity death is random? [end transmission] |
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| ...lol. | |||
| 02:26pm 06/12/2009 | |||
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noooooooooo [end transmission] |
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| The song meme, again. | |||
| 10:47pm 19/11/2009 | |||
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Step 1: Put your MP3 player or whatever music player you have on random. Step 2: Post a line/stanza from the first 20 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song. Step 3: Post and let everyone you know guess what song and artist the lines come from. Step 4: Bold the songs when someone guesses correctly. (No Cheating) (I love doing these. I don't know why. My music is weird.) Songs that have no lyrics have not been included, for obvious reasons. 1. Things haven't been the same, since you came into my life. (Strangely, this was Garren's image song for awhile. Not sure why.) 2. It's getting cold, pick up the pace. (...in bed.) 3. Susa n da PRIDE mote amashiteru (I don't honestly expect anyone to get this one.) 4. [vocalizing] Four years, you think for sure, that's all you've got to endure... (This guy's voice is so high-pitched.) 5. How did we ever go this far? You touch my hand and start the car. (SHUT UP IT'S REAL TO ME) 6. Feels like the weight of the world, like god in heaven gave me a turn. (Go cry, emu kid.) 7. Walked past my grave in the dark tonight, saw the stone and note you left for me... (this one's kind of obscure too, and faintly religious, but I liked it anyway.) 8. When you walk away, you don't hear me say... 9. Pump it! LOUDER! Pump it! LOUDER! (I left these two together on purpose.) 10. Ya had plenty money nineteen twenty-two... (we share two things: a sultry, sexy aura, and a giant back.) 11. Life's a show, and we all play our parts... (I liked the demo version of this better, with the piano.) 12. Zankoku na tenshi no you ni Shonen yo, shinwa ni nare... (This was one of the songs that earned the honor of being called "Most cheerfully inappropriate song for a dark and angsty anime" by my brother. Other contenders: Freckles from Rurouni Kenshin and Ready Steady Go from FMA.) 13. Well I couldn't tell you, why she felt that way, she felt it every day. (Skittle gave me this song, and it became Ella's image song. I still am not very sure what it's actually called, but was shocked as to who it was sung by.) 14. Laughing, laughing and laughing... (I couldn't find the original Japanese lyrics to this song, even though there's no English version. Go figure.) 15. There comes a time, when you face the toughest of fights! (SHUT UP THIS SONG IS AWESOME) 16. We are what we're supposed to be, illusions of your fantasy... (this band always reminds me of the kind of really super sweet, sticky blue flavor of candy that you loved as a kid, but won't go near as an adult.) 17. Chim-chiminee chim-chiminee chim-chim-chiree, a sweep is as lucky, as lucky can be! (I have never met anyone who doesn't like this song.) 18. ESTUANS INTERIUS IRA VEH - EMENTI, ESTUANS INTERIUS IRA VEH - EMENTI-- (...in bed.) 19. Hikaru kumo tsukinuke FLY AWAY, Karada-juu ni hirogaru PANORAMA (I love this song. Fucking love it. Just because the title makes absolutely zero sense, even for a Japanese song.) 20. Spend all your time waiting, for that second chance... (these sick and injured animals were abused because you won't give money to our charity. As punishment, we will make you bawl like a little bitch every time you want to watch Crocodile Hunter reruns.) Guess away. Most of these are pretty easy, in retrospect. I really wanted to get "America, Fuck Yeah," but it didn't come up. Woe. [end transmission] |
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| Tales from the Stop | |||
| 12:44am 08/11/2009 | |||
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Work was okay today, even if it did seem like the longest four hours of my life. Business is definitely picking up now that the Holiday Season ™ is getting into full swing, and I'm finding it easier to recommend things to people. Still, though I have a 'quota' of how many Blade Card subscriptions and game reservations I'm supposed to get every day, the people that come to me are either broke (I feel like a douchebag watching some ten-year-old kid laboriously count out enough pennies to cover tax for his two-dollar game and have to ask, "Would you like to spend $14.95 on a Blade Card?") or hostile ("Would you like to subscribe to ou--" "WHAAAARRRRGARBLE!!"). I really try not to push it, because I know that some people who might have bought a card will decide not to if I babble on about it incessantly when they just want to get back to their lives, but I'm always seriously behind on my quota, and Pilsbury Dough Boy (my boss, who got the name for looking like he's made of uncooked bread dough) always gives me this look, like "you are the weak link." (He's actually always really nice to me, and offers to give me more hours and stuff. I just want to make him not regret hiring me.) Real Gamers who really need and could use a Blade Card regularly, and love getting the Lame Informer magazine in the mail... usually already have one. (There's a kid who comes in regularly who has long hair and a brown trench coat and basically looks and acts like Control Freak from Teen Titans. He's really sweet, always buys stuff and is happy to fanthing with me over whatever's coming out soon, but sometimes I want to stop him and say, "son, do you know you dress like a cartoon villain?" His excitable friend reminds me of a guy I new in elementary school, who once, at my urging, drowned some ants in his own phlegm. ) Today I worked a different shift than usual-- eleven to three instead of six to nine, and since I was awake far earlier than I'm used to (I'm a lazy ass and my sleep schedule's all screwed up), I was sleepy and slightly loopy for about the first hour of my shift. My manager, Timmy, pulls me aside. TIMMY: I have a question. JAYDEE: ...Yes? TIMMY: ...Do you do drugs? JAYDEE: Uh... no. (Timmy will often ask me random things when it's slow to get me to talk to him-- he once asked me what my favorite game was that rhymed with 'Taiyoshock', but this was sort of personal.) TIMMY: None at all? JAYDEE: ...No? TIMMY: It's just because you seem sort of loopy today, and... JAYDEE: Oh, I... what? So yeah, apparently I wasn't just 'tired,' I was so out of it that my manager thought I was high. Yay? I tried to pick it up after that, and when I was done with my shift Timmy told me that I'd done good work and did well with customers, with no mention of the fact that he'd thought I'd come into work after snorting coke from between a hooker's tits or something. I work six hours a week for minimum wage. Do you really think I can even think about affording drugs? I mean really. It makes for a funny story now, but at the time I was horrified that he thought it was bad enough to talk to me about it. Gotta get to bed earlier, I guess. (As I'm typing this, it's almost one in the morning. Uh...) I would talk about Nano, but it's too depressing. After suffering headaches, body aches, screaming children, and almost inhaling toxic fumes from mixing bleach and ammonia while cleaning out the fridge (I ARE A GENIOUS!), I've just been too exhausted to even try to get my brain in gear to write anything. So I'm like, ten thousand words behind. Wewt. (I'd like to use Write or Die, but the first time I tried it, I found a way to cheat-- the program doesn't actually track words, only keystrokes. So if your screen starts turning red, you hit the space bar for more time. I guess I'm just not good at the stream-of-consciousness all-or-nothing style of writing that so many people swear by for Nano-- it even takes me forever to write blog entries. Hence the reason they're so rare these days. Twitter enables me to be lazy.) Here's a video of James Earl Jones counting to ten in the creepiest way possible on Sesame Street: Aaaand that's all I got. [end transmission] |
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| "I want you to hit me as hard as you can." | |||
| 04:14pm 04/11/2009 | |||
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I laughed so hard I almost pooped. This isn't a terrible idea-- it's a FANTASTIC one! Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Chip & Dale's Rescue Rangers and Fight Club. The story should use anorexia as a plot device! Generated by the Terrible Crossover Fanfiction Idea Generator [end transmission] |
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| Sors Imanis, Et Imanis | |||
| 01:40am 28/10/2009 | |||
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What? A blog? I don't have a blog, do I? Spooky crap for Halloween, yay! The story of the Ourang Medan begins in 1947, when two American ships received a distress call while navigating the Strait of Malacca, off the coast of Malaysia. The caller identified himself as a member of the crew of the Ourang Medan, a Dutch vessel, and supposedly claimed that the ship’s captain and crew were all dead or dying. The messages became jumbled and bizarre before trailing off and ending with the words: “I die.” The ships quickly raced to the scene to help. When they arrived, they found that the Ourang Medan was undamaged, but that the entire crew—even the ship’s dog— was dead, their bodies and faces locked in terrified poses and expressions, and many pointing at something that was not there. Before the rescuers could investigate further, the ship mysteriously caught on fire, and they had to evacuate. Soon after, the Ourang Medan is said to have exploded and then sank. While the details and the overall veracity of the Ourang Medan story are still widely debated, there have been a number of theories proposed about what might have caused the death of the crew. The most popular of these is that the ship was illegally transporting nitroglycerin or some kind of illegal nerve agent, which was not properly secured and seeped out into the air. Others, meanwhile, have claimed the ship was a victim of a UFO attack or some other kind of paranormal event. From this article: Top Ten Ghost Ships. Also check out The Six Creepiest Places on Earth by Cracked.com; Five Scary Places and the Legends Behind Them, from Mentalfloss.com (these are 'lesser-known' scary places); ....and just for the hell of it, Top Ten Unexplained Disappearances from Toptenz.net. On the news front, I am feeling tired and icky (from the weather/possible infection), but trying to get up enthusiasm for Nanowrimo. Went to a Wrimo meetup today, got goodies, but was frustrated that the meeting joint was crammed full of people talking and loud music, and I had to strain to hear the ML who apparently had never learned to use her Outside Voice. Still, goodies, including another sticker for Rakuen, which is always nice. Go check out White Wolf Bayou for my nanoing crap. Also, if you're a fellow Nanoer and I haven't already buddied you on the site, hit me with a comment and your username so I can find you. Playing Final Fantasy VII on my PSP (yay downloadable classics!); the last week and a half have been like a rerun of seventh grade for me (maybe that's why I'm so moody). Playing the game at (almost) twice the age I was when I first ran through it, I can now 1. Appreciate the storyline; 2. Wince at the 'cutting edge' graphics, including the 'cinemas' (FMVs to you non-Jaydee'rs and 'in-game movies' or 'cutscenes' *eyeroll* to newbie gamers); 3. Fangirl even more crazily over Sephiroth, who is just as completely fucking awesome (and deranged) as I remember him, if not more. I also checked out Crisis Core from work (and was supposed to give it back like... last week) and totally creamed at the pure undistilled awesome (and fanservice) that it provided me. I've put it on hold until I finish FF7 though, or at least get through the first disc, so refresh my memory on the story. Should watch Advent Children again. When I mentioned this prospect to Skittle, she just about jumped up from her chair to go find Important Things to do. Weather continues gloomy. Mood matching... [end transmission] |
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| Closer and closer! | |||
| 09:48pm 14/10/2009 | |||
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Nothing much happening on my nano front, other than I did some research on the Loup-Garou (nothing much to be had there, unfortunately) and the Louisiana Bayou. I guess some more web-trolling is in order, at least to keep myself from having to come up with a plot. (I'm still just bare-bones on that front, which is unusual for me. Maybe it means I'll win again?) Anyway:  I gots my official participant badge and icon (to be uploaded later), and another alterna-ticker:  Now all I need is a stockpile of coffee. (wow, this post was boring.) [end transmission] |
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